Two

[chainsawspistice]

[The growl of a chainsaw works its way out of Luministi Greens East and around the town square, escalating from a purr to a roar and back again as zombie encounters are quickly taken care of. But as time passes, the chainsaw is audibly put to more and more use until it's buzzing away full-time. The curious might observe an unusual mob of zombies honing in on the sound with Kanaya trying to hack her way out of the epicenter.

She's not too distracted to make a broadcast with her CAT, though:]

So -- ambiguous half-statements from Proctor aside -- does anyone know the reason behind the sudden influx of undead broods? And has anyone devised a way -- to reverse the situation? Though any kind of improvement -- would be just as welcome.

[After a while, the drone of the chainsaw will stop for one reason or another. Scratched up, tired, and showered in zombie bits, Kanaya trudges back to Luministi Greens East with a haul of food, unbothered by the zombies. She doesn't know why, but she's not complaining.]

[Cue the next day, and Luke's door will be getting one knock... and then another.]

Comments

[luke_triton]

You really don't look well. You can lie down on the sofa if you want to.

[chainsawspistice]

[A nod. It probably would be for the best. She lets go of Luke and shuffles to the couch in the living room.]

[luke_triton]

[Luke looks worried.

After a few minutes he sneaks in there with a blanket to give her.]

[chainsawspistice]

[When he does, he'll find that she's lying with her eyes closed, looking increasingly feverish and flushed green. She coughs every now and then and seems not to notice Luke's entrance.]

[luke_triton]

[Literally green in the face? Luke's even more worried now, and when he covers her with the blanket he can tell she's warm.

Time to call in some reinforcements. He keeps an eye on Kanaya while getting out his CAT to call her friends.]

text to terezi and vriska

Something's wrong with Kanaiya.

[text] --> [perma-achtung]

[notsot8rri8le]

[Check this: she is so smooth, she's taking booty calls while beating up a shitton of zombies. Soooooooo smooth, smoother than even troll Britney Spears' shaved gray orb of a head. But still infinitely cool and not at all pathetic.

Whoops, that's right -- she had a booty text.

........

SIGH.]

Snore. Why don't you whack her over the head with your two wheel device? I assume that's what you're supposed to use it for.
And a loc8tion would 8e helpful, I guess.

[She waves daintily to the undead below her and, in a trail of sparkly blue, flies towards Luke's place. He hasn't mentioned a location yet, but she can make a guess. It's better to keep on moving after all.]

[text] --> [perma-achtung]

[luke_triton]

No it's for riding. She's green and really warm.

My house. A1. Watch out for the people.

[text] --> [perma-achtung]

[notsot8rri8le]

[She makes a face at the CAT screen.]

This is starting to sound fishy. Are you touching her inappropri8ly? And if you are, where???????? Ha.
Man, this is nothing. The people should 8e watching out for ME. ::::)

8tw.
HANDS OFF.

[luke_triton]

Of course not! She almost fell over! I wouldn't just let her fall.

[notsot8rri8le]

A likely story!

[No, really. The likeliest story. What a proper prude. Just the type of character Kanaya would take to.

So Kanaya almost fell, hmm? Okay, that is a bad sign.]

I noticed that you included Pyrope in your message.
Going to let the 8lind girl deal with her then?

[w/e + actiony thingy]

[terezi_pyrope]

[obligatory glance through.]

1LL B3 TH3R3 B3FOR3 YOU C4N R3C1T3 TH4T W31RD HUM4N PO3M 4BOUT ROS3S

[oops she's on her way there now after falling down those stairs.

GODDAMNIT.]

[luke_triton]

[Good thing he doesn't know about the stairs.]

I picked you two because you know her already.

t-z go take your action thingy elsewhere it's not your turn yet

[notsot8rri8le]

There's no need for you, Pyrope.
I got this. You can go run into more trees and lick some more shoes. Do whatever 8lind and dum8 trolls like you like to do when you're not doing anything useful.
You know, your usual st8.
8ye, loser!

[Good thing she doesn't care about the stairs. Toughen up, Pyrope!]

Duh.
8ut why don't you 8e a little more honest, Luke human? You only called us 8ecause you're scared of what might happen, aren't you.
Well, whatever. Here's Vriska to do all the dirty work for you! All of it.

[It takes her a few more minutes of flying and zombie butt-kicking before she lands in front of his door, now Zombie Free and Temporarily Safe. Knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock.]

[luke_triton]

[He called because sick people from another universe probably need people from their own universe to help them if available. Right? He wouldn't want a stranger if he was sick.

Luke answers on the eighth knock - it took him that long to stop fretting. And Vriska's presence in the doorway is a relief.

He's still going to try to yank her inside the way he did Kanaya. Just in case.]

You got here fast!

[notsot8rri8le]

[She's a little surprised by the yank, but at least he's being smart about it. Vriska approves of that.]

I flew. Being resourceful is kinda my thing. Along with being the best at practically everything.

[She eyes him. He looks all right, scared maybe but normal. Then she brushes past him to where Kanaya lays.

She frowns.]

[chainsawspistice]

[She's pushed away Luke's blanket by now and is breathing heavily, her face tinged green. A wrist is covering her eyes and she seems not to notice Vriska's arrival.]

[luke_triton]

See? She looks really sick.

[notsot8rri8le]

Whatever. She'll be fine.

[Vriska's sure about that, though she doesn't look happy. She doesn't look relieved, either. There's a tinge of resignation in her statement.]

But you won't be if you stay here. So we're getting out. First........

[She's never done this to Kanaya before. It surprises her that she feels regret over this. She doesn't let that stop her though. Reaching with her powers, she twines her mind with Kanaya's, nudging and coaxing the other troll into a deep but temporary slumber.]

[chainsawspistice]

[Oh, that's nice. She will do as this sudden new persuasion beckons and stop being conscious. Her expression eases and her arm drops to hang over the couch.

/KO'd.]

[luke_triton]

It's my house, why can't I stay? We're not going to just leave her here alone.

[Luke looks from Kanaya to Vriska and back again.]

Did you do something to her?

[notsot8rri8le]

I merely used my powers to put her to sleep.

You can't stay because she's here and she's dangerous. I know danger when I see it with my goofy eight eyes. And I've known her for as long as forever.

[She turns to him.]

Look, Luke. You just have to trust me. Can you do that?

[luke_triton]

[He really doesn't have a choice. Even though Kanaya's not dangerous and has never punched him and went to explore the car with him.]

...Yeah. But...will she be okay?

[notsot8rri8le]

Oh, she'll be fine! The last thing she can do is die. [Not the complete truth, but not a lie either.] Now tick-tock, go get your stuff.

[luke_triton]

[Die? He gapes at Vriska through the 'tick-tock' line and for a few seconds afterward. Then he runs to the pantry to put all of the important things (and some food) into his shoulder bag, making sure to close it tight.

He has a feeling they're going to do the flying thing again.]

[notsot8rri8le]

[Any other time and Vriska would have let slip a scathing comment or two. But she's worried about Kanaya, and she doesn't want to chance a meeting with Terezi who will surely be arriving soon, so they have to leave now.

She scoops Luke up bridal-style, and sets him on the roof.]

One last thing.

[With that, she's back inside. She takes our her Fluorite Octet and hesitates for a split second. What if she's wrong and Kanaya's not changing? Well, then the same thing would happen, wouldn't it? Yes, that's right. Either she would change into a mindless undead with a chainsaw or a very mindful undead with a chainsaw. If it was the first, then Pyrope would fix it soon enough.]

Arrivederci, Maryam. And sorry for this, I guess.

[Smiling grimly, she rolls a few musclebeasts. For once, the number's not eight. Just a few, just enough to keep a dangerous undead occupied should she wake up.

It's lucky then, she supposes, that this immortal had no need to fear death.]

Have fuuuuuuuun, Pyrope! Sucker.

[She flies to the roof to pick Luke up again. At last, they're off to Mu's tower.]