luministi | [Video] S03E01: Fitz and the Tantrums

[The transmission begins with something of a disdainful snort. Someone is ~~on the verge of~~ throwing a tantrum as he stands in front of a window displaying the starry expanse outside, clutching a pillow in the most aggressive way it's physically possible for him to clutch a pillow.]

Really? Really!? I spent HOW many months making sure that every little nook and cranny of this station remains perfectly flawless and beautiful, waiting and waiting AND WAITING for this day, this MOMENT, and THIS is the thanks I get!? Being locked back here!? Just how in the hell am I supposed to welcome everyone like this, huh!? How am I supposed to be a gracious, pleasant host when I'm locked in the station's equivalent to a GODDAMN MAINTENANCE CLOSET!?

[His death-grip on the pillow tightens visibly.]

I'm going to have a word with that man, and if he doesn't help me fix this, I... I'll think of something!!

[The video switches off, but the audio stays on for a moment to catch a muffled comment:]

This was supposed to be such a good day...

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[oh, he's noticed, all right. he just doesn't care. ~~Sorry Ichijou~~] Unfortunately, they didn't. Now, we can spend all day here wishing things weren't this way, or we can try to do something about it.

Well, what exactly would you recommend trying, then? You're on your own if you're planning to try force, and I've already alerted you-know-who.

[he holds up one of these grenades] I was thinking of trying this. I think even you could use one if you wanted. [he just might have a few on him--and more on his ship in the docking bay]

A grenade? Are you serious?

Don't you think that might, you know, possibly compromise the structural integrity of the entire station and kill everyone?

Do you have anything more elegant? Something like a surgical laser but on a larger scale would be great...

[he waits for Ichijou to stop speaking, pulls the pin and casually tosses the grenade towards the door where it explodes in a nice fiery bang--but ultimately doesn't scratch anything. well, it leaves a little scorch mark, but nothing that can't come out with a smidge of elbow grease]

Well, it doesn't seem to have compromised anything.

[He lets out a startled yelp and stumbles backwards a bit, positioning one hand on his chest and one over his mouth. Ichijou's expression is conveying a combination of "Did that really just happen?" and "Holy shit, this guy's going to kill us all," and it's a bit hard for him to process his own thoughts over his frantic heartbeat.]

That-
Well-
Um-
It--

A-any other ideas?

[Wash might--might--have smiled ever so slightly because of that reaction. shame he's wearing a helmet so no one will ever know if that is the case or not. his voice, on the other hand, is still just as casual as it was moments before he lobbed a grenade and waited for it to explode.]

I suggest searching the entire spacestation. See what areas we can get into and what buttons still function.

It seems like it'll be a futile effort, but I suppose there's no reason not to give it another look or a few.

Just... Could you please give me an advance warning if you're planning to detonate anything else? My heart still feels like it's trying to claw its way out of my throat. [And, with a sigh;] I don't know how I'll get those singe marks out, either.

It might be, but you never know. We might get lucky. [though he isn't holding his breath.]

[raises an eyebrow behind his helmet] I'm sure you'll find a way. [notice he doesn't mention anything about warning him about detonations.]

If it's a matter of luck I may actually have a chance. While it may not seem like it as of late, I'm typically an exceptionally lucky person!

Though not lucky enough to have something to scrub that off with at the moment. I'll probably have to retrieve a stiff brush or some steel wool...

[Oh, he noticed.]

You know, if we're going to be living together for a while it would be great if we could try to avoid causing each other chronic stress from a constant fear of spontaneous, fiery explosions.

[though he has a long track record of having luck on his side when it comes to surviving encounters and unpleasant situations, he doesn't quite believe in it fully. after all, if his luck were any better, those things wouldn't have happened to him. that said, he certainly isn't one to break someone else's illusions about luck and fortune.] Nonetheless, we'll need all the luck we can.

How about I warn you when I'm thinking about using one? I think that will cut down on your stress. [because he? has no stress, not when it comes to proximity to explosions or explosions in general.]

Yes, yes, that seems reasonable. I think it'll benefit you, too, since I'll be bothering you a lot less.

And I won't stress-eat all of our food.

[...now this he can get behind. not that he thinks the man is truly annoying, but any ways he can stem certain behaviors and make his life easier? he'll certainly take.]

That's good to hear. We don't know yet if any of the life support systems have been compromised--including all food production ones. [...though now that he's said that, he's probably sure that isn't going to help]

[Under most circumstances this would be cause for panic, but...]

I do truly hate being pessimistic, but I came to the same conclusion. Something in the air smelled different this morning. It makes me wonder if whatever is used to bring people here is draining resources from the rest of the station's systems...

Fortunately I don't need to eat much. And- [His expression goes crooked as he tries to figure something out.] Do you even eat?

[It immediately strikes him as an incredibly stupid thing to ask, but with that suit on Wash always seemed more mechanical than organic.]

[he nods, impressed] I've thought the same. [he's definitely checked those systems every time he's gone to the bridge.] Keep an eye on the life support systems. If anyone shows up and anything fluctuates severely? One of us will be able to see that.

[he blinks; then, simply:] Of course I eat. I've already had breakfast.

It's been a while since I've had to sit around monitoring systems all day. I suppose I can't complain - at least it's a relatively safe job.

[He smiles nervously with a light blush tinting his cheeks.] Sorry, it's just that suit of yours. It makes you look awfully robotic.

[If he were any less intimidated by Wash, he would've put an emphasis on the "AWFUL."]

[he looks down at his hand, flexing it, then back at Ichijou]

You really haven't seen armor before, have you?

I've seen ancient armor... In paintings and statues...

Then you understand the basic principle behind armor, then. Trust me, I've seen robots and other androids and you can't mistake those for people. They make far too much noise, for one.

[Video] S03E01: Fitz and the Tantrums

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